Another year

Another year. Another anniversary. Every year the feeling gets stronger. The realization that whatever we are today is majorly attributed to you. I continue to navigate life’s maze with the foundations you instilled. 

The world changes so much. I stop and wonder how you made it all work. For us as a family.  Holding your own in an ever-changing world. I want to tell you today, thanks for being that constant in my life that never changed. I want to thank you for telling me things will be alright. Though I know things may not always be, I know you weren’t lying. You were being a father. 

When I saw you with Turner,  your first grandchild, I understood there was still so much love for you to give. He was your life. I saw a child’s demeanor change and interests form. Today, when I see Nithin with them, I ask him if he is worried about what the future is going to bring. His reply, “the only thing I can do is give them love and teach them to be loving individuals”. 

He perfectly verbalized what I was not able to. Verbalized what you did for us. You have taught us to be welcoming, loving, empathetic, and sincere. Most of all, you taught us nothing in life is handed to you. Everything needs to be earned. Maybe that is why even though there is unbearable sadness from your loss, there is no sense of entitlement from this world. The world had given us the best Dad a person could want. It had given us memories not everyone has. 

Love you dad and thanks for all you were and continue to be. You will always be with me, however life turns out.

He never poses for photos. But he played along this time. No questions asked. The day was overcast. The lighting was just right. I cherish these photos everyday.
When his glasses turned black, I told him to take them off. I wanted to see his eyes. His kind eyes.

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